You only have today….

When I was a kid, it seemed that the real life started when you start elementary school. When you get the first class schedule, your first official assignment schedule, and then when you learn a multiplication table, and that is going to be like reaching the top of the world in your highest and thinnest high heels, but then they told me I was just ridiculous because the real life will start when I start high school. When I started high school I thought this is it because I am now a big girl who goes to a big school and who, like Blair Waldorf, can sit on the stairs of the school and drink coffee. Soon I realized that this was not it. When I started collage in a newer and bigger city, I thought I finally reached that best life time, but then they told me that it was nothing because the real life is when you have a job and you had a full pay (if you ever succeed finding a job) because then you can afford a lot more than you can afford as a “poor” student. When I started my first paying job they told me that real life will begin when you have your family and when you fit your prioritize on some new criteria.

I do not know how exactly it is called the time we live in, because it is definitely not present, and that is not a past, and especially Croats we do not live in the future, we can eliminate that first. I do not know what it’s called the mid-time where we spend our entire life waiting for some good time and doing nothing to make it happen, but I know that people always think there is time to tell somebody that we like them more than Louboutin’s new shoe collection and that we would rather be with this dear person in the cardboard box in the park than in the first place of Saab’s fashion show (that’s the real one).

We think we have the time to design and launch that great project that will change the world, but we will start working on it from Monday because somehow it is all supposed to start on Monday, but then when Monday comes we think that “On Monday even the grass doesn’t grow”, and we postpone it till future notice.
We think we have time to make a someone dear to us those lasagna which they love so much and their favorite chocolate cake too, that we have time to surprise him with tickets for some boring game that he likes so much, but not today, some other day because now we have to deal with who will message who first, who’s turn is to not to answer to somebody’s message for three days, what does that smiley face means that he did not put at the end of the message, what it means that he put putt the point at the end although he never puts a point in the end, what it means that he put a plain smiley instead of the winking one  and other very rational analyzes.

Then one day in this way or in another way we separate paths with these dear people, and we stay in the same place wondering would it be different that we really made those lasagna and that chocolate cake for the dessert that we would serve with those tickets for that annoying game, what would have happen if we put down our cell phone, stopped analyzing smileys, periods and commas and acknowledged some things as if there is no tomorrow because maybe really is not there.

What if we started working on a super project that we have going through our mind, would somebody recognized by now, acknowledged and accepted?? What would it be that we dared to pack our  suitcases along with our pride and went after someone we loved who was waiting for us or what would have happened if we had dared to get on that train that morning? Instead, for days, months, years, or longer we will say the easy thing – that it should have been like this and that it will pass. “Everything will pass, sir,” said quiet Ibrahim Paro. But, what kind of comfort is that? Joy will also pass by, love will also pass, and life will pass. Is it hope that everything goes by? “Wrote Mesa Selimovis,( The Fortress) and I am a freak who has a few quotes for every opportunity in her head because the things I like I read so often until I memorized them spontaneously. I’m weird, I know.

We bother ourselves with stupid things, we think we should not be late to the cinema, that we should not be late for the sale in our favorite store, that we should not be late for the lecture, that we should not be too late to order a jacket before the winter from eBay or that we should not be late to start a new series, but we are late to much more important things in life that later we will ask ourselves what it could have been if it had happened, not realizing that all of our problems are based on that one sentence – “There is time” which is so easily thrown around even though no one guarantees that you really have.

Maybe today is a good day, maybe the worst day in the world, but it’s the only one you have. Yesterday is gone for good no matter how sometimes we do not want and the truth is that some “yesterday” can always be transferred little to “today”, but you cannot live in the yesterday, because in that way you do not live either in yesterday or today.
Tell somebody you love him, today. Get involved with what you like, today. Risk it today. Learn how to make a lasagna that somebody loves, today. Send a message to that boy you like because it’s your turn and send it today. I believe that the universe can conspire to realize our dreams and it is today, but not without our engagement which would also need to be today, and not always “from tomorrow”. The worst that can happen is that one day you’re at peace because you tried, and that is not so bad. I’m going to finish with the quote from a dear singer Balasevic, who is a great inspiration for many of my texts:  “Just to tell you, my sleepy mouse, when you want something nice to say to someone, do not wait for tomorrow because many were late. And that’s why I am waking you up. „. Today.

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