It is all right, little girl…

Little girl, they never told you what you needed to know. They thought you were not going to be such fate that you would need lessons from the dark side of life. But you did need them. Well, they needed to tell you. You entered the world of darkness completely unprepared, white and pure as tears. Unaccustomed to the cruelty and cold that only a male heart can produce and provide. You did not know that his warm words were just a trap for you.

You did not know that he actually did not think of anything that he said and promised to fulfill. You did not know at all that some promises were never fulfilled and some people did not respect their words. You were confused. You were in love.

Do not blame yourself, who would not fall in love with those eyes that acted so honestly and looked at you as if you were the most precious thing in this world? Who would not be thrilled to hear these wonderful words that those beautiful lips said? It was a trap and traps often go unnoticed and you cannot get around. You do not even realize that you’ve stuck in one of them until it’s too late.

It is not difficult to deceive a good heart, let it comfort you because yours is just that, good. You cannot deceive the one that always has something to hide, and those that are the same are always ready for it and are constantly on alert for others being deceived of something. That’s why you did not notice anything.

I know you think now that you’re full of flaws the way as you are, you think you’re stupid but trust me not. You’re still that little priceless gold that needs to figure out how much life can be beautiful. There are still remnants of those purity and pure innocence in your look.  Only this time, all of this comes packed with caution. With a lot, lots of it.

You want to change yourself, do you? But you do not even know how.

How do you know if you have chosen the right choices and made the right choices when it all seems wrong from this perspective? Is it worth a minute of happiness for the days of silence? Is it worth a minute of his love for hours for your anger and pain? You should have been everything to him. He should have kept you safe and you should have been important to him. You should have been loved. A beloved woman is kept as a little water in the palm and careful not to slip from it because she is precious.

This is hard little girl, all of this is hard. It is difficult to face life and ultimately yourself and tell yourself in the face that you were a fool. It’s hard to face up your own defeat when you know how much the battle was paid, when you know how big the sacrifice you have done and how much you yourself in all this lost. It’s hard to see him laughing at you and how he does not care. How he rejects you as you were an old and an unnecessary mat that accumulated dust, and now he doesn’t want it and is sick of it.

And you remember every step that led you to be where you are now.

You remember every pain, every tear and every moment when he was an asshole to you and you held yourself back so you can be at the same level with him. And you knew, admit girl, you knew somewhere deep in yourself that you two would not succeed. You knew you were going to give up along the way, that you’ll get tired of all of it.

You just did not know it would come so fast, that the force of his strikes will be so strong that it will throw you on your knees so quickly, you did not know that the pain would be so intense that you would break all the breath from your lungs before you find yourself again. You did not know you would love him so much, that’s right.

Do not worry little girl, it’s okay that you did not know.

It is all right, that you loved, that you tried and gave yourself. Do not worry you did not lose anything. You’ve learned, and now you know. And it’s okay to hurt, be prepared to hurt for a long time because you are such, all woven from delicate feelings. Remember that you are the one that is valuable and that he is just one more garbage in the sea of the same kind and you are the one precious salvage straw that could save his soul if he was not such a fool.

Because little girl you are just perfectly enough for somebody to love.

18 thoughts on “It is all right, little girl…”

  1. Wow. This was awesome. I loved the way you described how people will not have your best interest and how unprepared the girl was for the world. But most importantly I loved the response of why it is okay to have a good heart&to share it with others

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Beautiful and heartbreaking at the same time – you do a great job of capturing the struggles that many of us have felt throughout our lives as we face breakups, toxic relationships and self-esteem struggles

    Liked by 1 person

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