Which is the best recipe for dissatisfaction?

If you are naturally one of those people who, as soon as they wake up, looks around for what everybody else needs, to everyone to be happy, satisfied and fulfilled wishes, and if you are unconscious of your own existence, welcome to hell, that will eventually erupt. Because it is inevitable, since it is the revelation of your existence, the cornerstone without which nothing else goes. It’s great to help, to understand, to please. This is a very great feature that should be promoted and praised. However, it is great for people who first take care of their desires, needs and satisfaction, then move from there. By the reversal of the procedure, you simply cannot get anything good and as long as you think you can, you are losing yourself. Because whatever you are trying to build, building without a foundation in the very beginning is doomed to failure. You can build on all possible aspects of your own capacity, there is no chance that you will please everyone. You cannot influence other people’s opinions. If you think you can, you just live in the wrong. People will either love you or not and that is their decision. You most often have very little to do with that decision.

Hence, those astonishing statements, “How can he / she be with him / her …?”, even though there are a million flaws. Simple, because he/she has decided! One of the most wrong beliefs we may live in is how love needs or can be deserved. Love should not be deserved, because you are love. You will never be able to please everyone, it is a recipe for misfortune and dissatisfaction. If someone does not see the value of you, there is this gold brush with which you can draw it in one’s eyes.  Therefore, it is inevitable, let yourself know it. Only then would someone else see it. If you have not done it by now, time is to acknowledge yourself, your own existence. It’s time to be good to yourself. Not only to yourself when you are great, but to yourself when you are in all of your worst possible releases. It’s time to take care of yourself. However, you know and can. Because, without you everything else is false. It’s time to start building the right foundation.

Finally, I leave you with one Osho story from which you will draw the best lessons of this post, just like an answer to the title question. “What is the best recipe for dissatisfaction?” – Trying to please everyone.

“A Man and his son were once going with their Donkey to market. As they were walking along by its side a countryman passed them and said: “You fools, what is a Donkey for but to ride upon?”

So the Man put the Boy on the Donkey and they went on their way. But soon they passed a group of men, one of whom said: “See that lazy youngster, he lets his father walk while he rides.”

And thus the Man ordered his Boy to get off, and got on himself. But they hadn’t gone far when they passed two women, one of whom said to the other: “Shame on that lazy lout to let his poor little son trudge along.”

Well, the Man didn’t know what to do, but at last he took his Boy up before him on the Donkey. By this time, they had come to the town, and the passers-by began to jeer and point at them. The Man stopped and asked what they were scoffing at. The men said: “Aren’t you ashamed of yourself for overloading that poor donkey of yours and your hulking son?”

The Man and Boy got off and tried to think what to do. They thought and they thought, till at last they cut down a pole, tied the donkey’s feet to it, and raised the pole and the donkey to their shoulders. They went along amid the laughter of all who met them till they came to Market Bridge, when the Donkey, getting one of his feet loose, kicked out and caused the Boy to drop his end of the pole. In the struggle the Donkey fell over the bridge, and his fore-feet being tied together he was drowned. “That will teach you,” said an old man who had followed them:

“Please all, and you will please none.” (Osho)

8 thoughts on “Which is the best recipe for dissatisfaction?”

  1. I loved the fable at the end – I’d never heard it, and yet it’s such a good illustration of the point. I also really liked your earlier point about how, mostly, people form their opinion of you on their own, and you probably can’t make them feel a certain way by your actions. This piece has given me a lot to think about!

    Liked by 1 person

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