When a woman learned to support another woman, men would realize that we were not things

Men seeing us as things. Have you ever wondered my dear women, to what extent we are to blame ourselves for it by forgetting to be allies to one another? Keep on reading. I have a point with this post. Trust me.

Sometimes I love summer storms, sometimes my bones crack because of them, but the one today … it just feels good. Freshness filled the street and the room, as she slipped through the open window and the curtains apart. The sound of thunder in the distance makes a feel sleepy….

I had a few ideas what to write about, some of the burning topics I would like to give my opinion on, but when I sat down at my desk and turned on my laptop, they all evaporated. I know, something should be said about the Anti-fascist struggle, but everyone wrote about it, maybe the upcoming elections, but I’m not a fan of politics anyway. It would be convenient to touch on the new season of “The Handmaid’s Tale” and to draw a parallel with the burning topic of abortion, but already tired of it, as well as those who persistently try to abolish women’s right to choose.

I could also think of some conservative Catholics trying to get the whole list of books out of schools, because they say about pornography and pedophilia, which seems so comical to me because of the very fact that so many Catholic priests abuse children …but I don’t have the will to do that today either. I just became exhausted by all those dark topics, which fill the newspaper columns and constantly distract us in the negative.

We are not ready for change.

I would like to read sometimes that we have solved something, that we have done something right, that we have learned something, but I know that it is fantasy and a desire for utopia.
We, as a society, are not ready for such changes yet, it would require leaving the comfort zone, and we do not like it. We have our own shit and we are good at it and we do not want to accidentally get into someone else’s shit because it is unknown to us, it would require pressure, work and change, and we have no nerves for that. Maybe in the fall, when it’s less hot …

A few days ago, I asked my Facebook friends what they thought about the topic of female sex appeal in the business, whether it was helping or retaliating, and I received a wide variety of answers. From strict proponents of dressing by the code (whatever that really means) to the liberal ones, all the way to advocates of open flirting when things are not going well.

Opportunity makes a thief.

I also did my mini-research in the circle of businessmen I know and got almost the same opinion – It is always nice to see a handsome woman who is intelligent and feels good in her own skin. Tt is tempting to the eye, it is good for their ego and they feel good in her company. Men are very simple on the subject (as in many other things). To them, a handsome woman is simply a handsome woman. They do not see her as a competition and will respect her if she respects herself, if not, a good portion of them will try to hook up with her. And they are very direct and open about that.

I must mention that I have also talked to journalists and directors and doctors, as well as to “ordinary workers”, who are either in relationships or married, divorced, and some are single. They all know very well what they want and how far they are willing to go, but only under the condition that the women are giving them a reason. They are very much in agreement that the woman decides what she wants and that they are absolutely not interested in women who clearly set boundaries and strictly stick to their jobs, because they know that they will not taste honey, but wormwood and give up at the start. How much are their views moral with regard to their partners, I leave it to their conscience.

On the other hand, women have told me everything, from how it is time to enter the 21st century and stop judging people by their looks and dress, to how disgusted they are by women who flirt and use their looks, to the point that, because of male persecution at work, they are strictly “buttoned up” with very little makeup.

But many of the women who discussed the topic with me agreed, interesting just like men, that it was completely irrelevant what a woman had on herself, but how she wears and how she radiates, what impression she leaves, how confident she is and how is treated. Some women may be buttoned up to the throat 365 days a year and radiated with sex appeal. Others, however, can be stripped naked and appear only vulgar. It’s all about attitude. They agreed that the woman chooses and that everyone, at all times, knows exactly how to handle her male counterparts and where to draw the line.

Some have mentioned that it simply matters what job you do and that of course there are jobs where your appearance and sex appeal are simply necessary, but you also need to know how to wear it.

Many have noted that the worst experiences are not really with men but with other women, which makes them even bother to wear makeup and be as seamless as possible. And I was wondering why this is so? Why do women, in most cases, see other women inevitably as competition?

I noticed this not only in business, but in absolutely every sphere of life. If you are free and hang out with friends who are in a relationship or married, they will certainly not like to be around you when their partners are there. When you are alone, for them you are only “that poor woman who has no luck in love”, and when you are together, you are a “walking danger”.
On the other hand, in the work place you are either the one who is applying for their job, or the one who is obstacle to their advancement, or simply the one who “thinks she knows more”. It has less to do with appearance than with the innate need for women to defend what they think falls within their territory. Whether it was a job, whether it was a marriage, or something else.

Any woman who feels threatened, by any means, is ready to take out her claws! And each of us at some point felt threatened, and all of us were reasonably or unreasonably jealous of another at some point in our life. Lies anyone who says that she never felt even a little sting of envy. It is only because one who admits them, not the one who denies them, can outgrow such feelings.

My girlfriend rounded up a woman’s jealousy like this: “”I can forgive you if you’re beautiful, I can if you’re smart, but there is no chance of forgiveness if you’re both.”

Let’s call it a real name – abuse

And she is absolutely right, as long as women will not support other women, but will consciously sabotage them because of the idea that they are in competition with each other, because of some stupid gene that we are all born with, which in the beginning makes us look at poker faces over table, we will not advance and we will not be able to protect ourselves from men who are predators. Predators who quickly pack morale into their pockets when a beautiful woman is created in front of them. Motto-driven predators – “I’ll try it because you only live once.” And we will not be able to exercise the woman’s right to choose what to do with her own body, nor will we protect our children from pedophiles and abuse.

Because abuse is not hidden in books that ardent Catholics want to ban, it resides in the human mind. It is an opportunity created for one who wants to hurt an innocent creature, just as it is an opportunity any immoral man thinks he gets when a pretty woman walks into his office for an ordinary meeting.

We live in the 21st century, so is it not time to call abuse the right name and stop seeking excuses for those whose actions have no justification.

Pedophiles, bullies and predators, who take advantage of their positions within a company, association, church and within their families. Let’s stop protecting them, dear women, let’s learn to protect ourselves! Together! Next to one and another without viewing one and another as competition but as a support. If we could do that then men would stop seeing us as things they can hurt and use.