I’m sorry, but I don’t feel wrong because I want better

When you start choosing your battles more carefully, when you start listening to yourself, you adjust those standards to yourself; when you get to know yourself well enough to know what you can agree to and what not, when you are no longer afraid to say no – people will at best consider you a threat and at worst a spoiled brat who waits for everything to fall from the sky.

People will nail your dreams and goals on your nose and make you guilty. Because today you must not wish for better, you must not think of yourself or your health – whether physical or mental. We are here today just to satisfy other people’s complexes and fill someone else’s wallets, at least it seems to me sometimes.

Take what you are offered. Shut up. Work. Be grateful you have at least that, because, you know, some have much worse conditions.

In normal situations, I agree with the last sentence. We have to be grateful for everything we have, but it’s not okay to use that sentence just to get you guilty because you want to do better and don’t agree to anything that might hurt you more.

And it was a harmless conversation, it was a 12-hour shift, and the payoff was actually kind of low, and I just said that I thought it was too much for anyone, and that you couldn’t expect a human to be one hundred percent functional all 12 hours. I didn’t even matter in the whole story, but I still got the tongue soup because it turned out that I didn’t appreciate the work and that I thought the money was growing on trees.

This is far from the truth because I value work far more than some might think, but I also value health more than anything. I also admire anyone who manages to endure abnormal conditions at work for some personal xy reason and I think they deserve all the respect of this world.

But don’t fool my eyes that this is the only choice that exists to build something in life.

And don’t tell me that people who do not agree to such hours are just spoiled brats. Because they are not. It’s another thing when you’re an emerging entrepreneur, so you have to work day and night to start a job because you’re doing it for yourself, and it’s another thing to enjoy something so it’s no problem to stay and work overtime because you’re doing it for your own enjoyment .

The other thing is, when it comes to really unpopular work that you do temporarily because you have no choice at the moment, but the atmosphere in the workplace is great and relationships and timing are as fair and not so difficult.

And the tenth thing is when someone abuses you for the sake of it just to make it stay longer, without even thinking of a worker without whom, realistically, they cannot function. Unfortunately, there are more such people, and they will be the first to complain that no one wants to work.

I would be the first not to agree to such a thing because I know my limits.

My physical health has always been sensitive, and every time my mental health is shaken, here is a new illness. Sometimes it’s just a skin rash, and sometimes it’s much scarier, depending on the amount of stress. That is why I say that I value health more than anything.

And I don’t mean to risk it just so that I don’t turn out to be a spoiled brat, because all the money in this world and all the approval of the society is not worth it if you can’t enjoy it all.

I’d rather knock ‘on more doors and live a little slower until I find something better, than to lose for a quick cache both time and nerves that no one can give me back.

And if I’m guilty of it, stone me as you wish. My soul is calm.

2 thoughts on “I’m sorry, but I don’t feel wrong because I want better”

  1. Amazing post. I agree with the above comment too, you’re definitely right to have spoken up! I’m one who’s ALWAYS grateful for what I had. I express my gratitude every night before I go to sleep and it’s helped wonderfully with my mental health and mindset. But as humans, we always strive for more. I do. And we definitely shouldn’t feel guilty of that x

    Liked by 1 person

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