Spring cleaning

mischievouswordsbymartaazra

She wrote to me, “I don’t know, but this quarantine has opened my eyes. I guess because we are distant from all people, so we see better from afar. “

I knew immediately what she was talking about.

At some time without a corona, we would run for commitments, chase dreams and live in fifth gear. We would come home, or go for coffee, and talk about anything purely to shorten our time, purely to be pampered, and remove our thoughts from a busy day.

We would not choose too much or even think about the people around us. We would have a smarter job than thinking if we were with that person because it suits us, or out of habit, for safety. We would not even choose conversation topics. It doesn’t matter, give me anything, just to slow my brain down.

And now we have really slowed down. We reached a bend and from the fifth gear shifted to a second. We haven’t turned yet, but we are just about to. Because all of a sudden everything is amplified and we can no longer run away from ourselves.

There are not all those huge obligations that can turn our minds. Everything is here before us. From morning till dark. There they are. Suddenly you figure out who they are and what those energy-absorbing things are. Suddenly you realize that you have no common issues with some of them. It breaks your heart, I won’t lie, but it’s still heightened and you just can’t. You have nowhere to hide and pretend that these feelings, and cognitions, do not exist.

The things that relaxed you at that time were now only shallow and unnecessary, without meaning and purpose. Tiny conversations have become even more troublesome, and entertaining content without a shred of intelligence has long been no fun.

You surprise yourself by realizing that you miss things the most and the people who didn’t even cross your mind before. You are biting and using it because you are not missing what you might need, what would be rational and expected. After all, you’re laughing at yourself because you don’t believe how ironic life can be. And how much is in front of your nose; all the answers, options and exits.

Then you wonder why you didn’t give a little more attention to some people before. They were also there, but always on the sidelines while actually deserving of the lead role. Wondering why you didn’t do some things before. Obviously they bring you happiness and peace, so where it all stuck along the way?

And so you spin in a circle with a thousand questions, you fall apart again and you build from the ashes, you burn the old and shape the new until you turn. I say it as bad, but I don’t think it’s bad to turn away. It is only said that is bad, that it remains in their path and according to their measures.

And those aren’t your measures, are they? It’s getting too small. The material is too tight and the composition causes allergies. Move away. Turn off that path and continue on to the one that is more convenient, closer and more like you. It’s springtime, do your spring cleaning.

Pull out all the memories from the drawers and decides which ones are worth keeping and which ones just take up space. Wipe off the dust, look around and rearrange it to your liking.

For yourself.

Published by mischievouswordsbymartaazra

A dancer, a writter and a photographer who enjoys every moment in life

35 thoughts on “Spring cleaning”

  12. The quarantine definitely has different effects on everyone. I felt negative a few weeks back and then I decided one day to get over it and make myself productive instead. Indeed, this pandemic has made us realize what really matters in life. So in the next coming days, we should only keep our attention on those that have value.

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  16. Dammm this is soo true and so good point out. Life has changed but its finally made us realize what we are doing wrong and has given us time to make it right. I love this.

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  18. This pandemic only teaches us what we always brushed off, that includes basic hygiene and sanitation, caring our the environment and giving respect to nature.
    I don’t feel stressed much about this pandemic because I know what to do to protect myself, and being back to the basic is nothing new to me. I experienced it back in grade school and it was a good experience.

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  20. I’m jealous of those who have been able to slow down and re-evaluate. I am lucky to still be working from home, but between work and helping my four children with their distance learning, plus our homestead there is no chance for me to slow down.
    I’m happy for those who have.

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  22. I started to do some spring cleaning last week and it was amazing. I had to rearrange and throw out things but it brought a new vibe into my space. I agree with you. Great article!!!🤗

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  24. I enjoyed this. You write really well. You are right about the pandemic forcing us to slow down. There’s no denying that there is some good in it. We’ve suddenly noticed everything we never paid attention to and somehow, we are beginning to realize what is important. Great post.

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  27. this is a great realization. this quarantine helps us realize who and what really matters. but, we have to remember, that not because people aren’t talking to us mean they already forget about us. maybe, they’re also coping up with this situation and we all have varying situations right now. for some, it’s just nothing. but this period is really a time of struggles for others. i think the best we can do is to extend our patience and understanding. send them our prayers. 🙂

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  28. Cleaning out those external spaces can be very freeing (tip: take the “Pick and Purge” and/or “Clean Up”. However, extending that effort to your internal landscape can help identify and release unwanted emotions that have become burdensome and which clutter up your mind and heart. Shame and guilt are two very common emotions that could likely use some spring cleaning.

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  33. This time in quarantine has opened our eyes to a lot of new revelations. I’ve found myself buckle down to my roots – the things I used to enjoy that I never had time for. It’s been really nice!

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  34. Honestly, while I haven’t been able to drive to work, I haven’t slowed down during this pandemic. I simply made adjustments to my daily routine and added other self care activities to the mix. Perhaps over the last 10 years, I’ve sorted the imperative from the flighty and my friendships and family relationships have stayed close. The pandemic is frightening though and I pray for a vaccine to be developed soon.

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