If I were a man, would I be without a problem?

Although women are faced with obstacles from childhood to old age, it seems to me that we deal with them successfully. Although we are accused of being fragile, pathetic, and overly emotional, many of us have survived death, illness, job loss, divorce, breakup, custody struggle, gender-based violence, abortion, and more.

I wonder how men would deal with that, because some, despite all the circumstances that went in their favor, remained fraudsters and cowards. When it was hardest, they left or gave up. Women have been and remain a stable pillar of our society.

Life is not easy for any human in this world. Everyone has their own cross. Each person has their own way of dealing with and coping with their problems.

Throughout history, circumstances have been created that have favored men while women have been subordinate. Although we fought for our rights, in some circumstances and situations it was difficult for us.

He’s MACHO, she’s a whore!

If I were a seventy-year-old man and I had a young girlfriend, I would be celebrated by men and women, because I’m macho and because I can. But if I’m fifty and a younger boyfriend, society looks at me like a perverted slut. If I were 40 and not married I would be a spinster or an embittered, frustrated hag who doesn’t like anybody.

It is justified for men if they are not married in their forties or fifties, spend time in cafes, gamble, drink, change women, They are bohemians who will become legends for the village and the surrounding area. A woman is asked how many she have had so far, a woman is asked if she is a virgin still.

Until recently, the bloody sheet was proof that she had entered the marriage clean. No one asks these questions of a man, in fact, they are encouraged to promiscuity.

Everything is on the mother’s back

Today, mothers take care of more than 90% of child care. From breastfeeding, first steps, kindergarten, school, homework, parent meetings, nutrition, buying clothes, toys, organizing a child’s schedule, puberty, talking about contraception all the way to preparing for independent living. The statements “I’m busy” and “I have a lot of work” are justified to fathers.

Mothers are not forgiven if they continue their education, if they work at the same time or if they are dedicated to other activities. I recently had a meeting where a husband asks his wife what grade their son is going to as he stares mesmerized at the cell phone screen.

Glass ceiling

If I were a man and came to a job interview, no one would weigh me curiously from head to toe. There is a small chance that someone will throw something at me while I am sitting and explaining my motives for applying for a job. No one will ask me about parenting.

The woman is asked if she is married, how many children she has, or when she plans to have them. employers have not yet realized that our wombs are not part of their capital. A man does not have to worry about getting fired if his wife or partner gets pregnant.

Violence

Maybe if I were a man I wouldn’t be afraid to walk at night alone without the fear of being raped or taken in a van and sold into sex slavery. I would definitely act more freely when I go out.

The men don’t worry about being convicted of provocative clothing that was the trigger for rape according to society. I wouldn’t wonder if I would be a victim of domestic violence or if my partner would beat me if something was not according to his will.

I wouldn’t be so discriminated against because of my looks. I wouldn’t have to worry when I go to the gynecologist because it’s not a great feeling when you spread your legs and wait anxiously for something to be discovered on your ovaries or uterus.

I would not tolerate comments from male gynecologists about my vagina or experience a violent birth. I wouldn’t have to worry about getting pregnant and if I am ready for motherhood.

Heroine

However, women are successfully coping with all of these obstacles. They are not protected, but many of them protect their children and loved ones. They are fighters who do not give up when it is hardest.

That’s when they win. It would be good if society would support us more and motivate us to be even better and more successful. It would be better if discrimination and the rate of violence were reduced. For the whole society.

P.S This text is for anybody who has a uterus and who identifies as a women. We all are very much fucked by patriarchy that favors a cis straight man.