Women’s Day. Such a beautiful idea, a symbolic date, and donated flowers. But is that enough? Being celebrated just one day? What about all the other days? Are we less of a woman then? Smaller people? And why don’t we celebrate ourselves every day? Why are we often so cruel to ourselves, completely unjust?
And are we aware that there is no worse enemy than the one we carry within us?
All this, I wondered, reading a new title that was symbolically presented to us these days.
A book caught my eye, a title dedicated to women. A book that in a short time became a great sensation and bestseller in Poland.
“Women’s Return to Self,” by poet and columnist Natalie de Barbaro. I am sorry but there is no English translation yet or I could not find it.
Don’t we absolutely need it?
But how to get back to yourself? Where did we lose ourselves? How do we know which part of us is broken, cracked, wounded, and in fact almost lost?
We can find out, we can find each other again, but it takes a lot of courage, a lot of perseverance, and a desire to hear our inner voice. The voice of your soul.
But the question arises, how much are we actually connected to our own soul? How ready are we to hear the voice of our own insides and do we allow ourselves to do that at all? Do we allow that feeling from the edge of the diaphragm that sometimes pierces us sharply to send us a message that we are in imminent danger? Maybe not from physical injury but emotional yes? Do we allow ourselves inspiration, creativity, warmth, and joy or do we just follow, persistently, day by day, the beaten path of habit? What of their own, what of the inherited?
The idea of a Woman
Who really are we women? What kind of people live in us? Are we really people we would like to be or is it true that each of us is actually a slave to subconscious personalities within the one that bears our name and surname?
The submissive, the Ice Queen, and the Martyr are three personalities who intertwine and form that invisible iceberg of our subconscious that dictates our behavior. – so they were named by the author of the book I want to tell you about.
The submissive takes great care that she is eternally at her service, that her skirt covers her knees, that she is quiet and unobtrusive, the ideal of a gentle, caring mother without her own attitude and opinion. She goes hand in hand with the Martyr who lives to serve and patiently emphasizes her torment and renunciation every time her child does not want another bite of the meal that the mother painstakingly prepared, so there is the Ice Queen, a figure from hell who says: “Good you don’t need it ”and she approaches everything and everyone in a patronizing, military way as if people are her pawns. Whether it’s her family or her colleagues. It is goal-oriented and people are the means.
All three personalities are the fruit of upbringing, environment, stereotypes, and own expectations with a single mission, to separate the Woman from her core, her spirit, and her real needs and emotions.
A woman’s return to herself – a book that inspires
How to oppose them? Can our evil subconscious, that manipulates us so perfidiously be reshaped at all? And if so, how?
The woman’s return to herself, the Polish success of poet and columnist Natalie de Barbaro, is a drinkable testimony to the brave journey within a woman’s soul, facing the demons of our subconscious, the grievances we have towards ourselves and ways to transform from the inside out.
Natalia writes through her experiences, pointing out that in each of us there is actually a Subtle Guide, as she called her inner voice, her spirit and who navigates us through life and different situations, connects us with people, brings us teachers, and challenges us. through which we grow.
The author also talks about her desire for motherhood, about the disappointments she went through without being able to get pregnant naturally, about the moment when her son, whom she adopted with her husband, came to life, about her own expectations and relationship with her family. each of us.
Which person dominates you? Are you submissive to the world?
Are you playing the Martyr?
Or are you a successful and completely broken Ice Queen on the inside?
Who are you really?
As an author who writes about women and for women, and who deals with the same topics as Natalia, I feel that in me, even though I have been working on myself for years and pushing my own boundaries every day, all three personalities still shine at times. Sometimes I am forcibly submissive because society and the environment demand it of me. Sometimes I am a Martyr alone in my own eyes because I am angry at the world and its injustices, and sometimes I am the Ice Queen, the one who touches nothing, who successfully maneuvers through turbulent business waters, delegates tasks, does jobs, rushes from project to project and accomplishes the impossible. How much does it all take from my soul?
I conclude too much.
But I don’t give up on myself and I come back to myself every day. I absorb books, meditate, study, talk and speak my emotions out loud, and even at this moment as I write to you about a book that has absolutely inspired me, I reach for myself, for my Delicate Guide, and celebrate my femininity.
I invite you to join me, wherever you are, on whatever occasion you come to these pages and read these lines, join the journey and return to yourself. Let this book be your first step, your first step, and let it, like me, illuminate at least part of the way for you.
Happy Women’s Day, happy every day to my dear ones.
1 thought on “A woman’s return to herself, a journey we really need to embark on”
This book sounds like such a beautiful and inspiring read. I hadn’t heard of it before but now I feel like I have to check it out. Thank you!