Instant happiness? No thanks, I’ll face it, because everything is fleeting

Last night I learned that selling cheap motivational forums is great in theory, but difficult to implement in practice.

My friend’s eight-year-old was sad and angry because of the unfair situation that happened to him. Both my friend and I started, instinctively, with hugs and consolation.

When that didn’t work either, nor was everything going to be okay, we used the methods of a bad and budding “I drank all the wisdom in the world” motivational speaker and focused his eyes on what he had, instead of focusing on what makes him angry in that, we emphasized several times, one, “exception” situation.

“And what would you do if you got a lower salary for one month? Never mind. Just so. And the second is to get as much as you need. Would you be angry and sad, or would you not care, because it only happened once.”

Okay. Checkmate! It’s our own fault. We both taught that child to think and think critically.

It is OK! It pays off. Bang your fist on the pillow. Scream if you want. Let it out. Don’t let it suffocate you.

Instant happiness is like a big NO

Why do I have to pretend it doesn’t matter to me if I care?
Why do I have to pretend to be happy, if it’s tearing me apart inside?
Why do I have to pretend I don’t care if I’m hurt?

One of the worst things we got from the flood of social networks and public living of private lives, is instant happiness.

Do not be sad!
Don’t be angry!
It’s not worth it!
Don’t think about it!
Forget it!

Think positive! It will be positive!

Everyone is smiling, beautiful, combed, and always happy. No one has gray hair, dark circles, excess weight, unwashed hair, or wrinkles. Nobody cries. No one is mad. No one is ever sad.

How should I be then?!

A bunch of self-proclaimed psychologists teaches us that this is how it should be. That happiness is a matter of decision, not circumstances. To radiate and attract. To enjoy every moment. To be happy now and immediately.

Life is short, isn’t it!

We play those games. We compete in the size of the smile, white low, pearl snow incisors. We are happy here and now. In front of everyone…
But that’s bullshit! A performance for the public, in which we did not even convince ourselves, let alone anyone else! No one is happy all the time. It’s not natural. It’s not healthy to muffle a scream when you’re f*cing angry. It is not natural to swallow tears. Quietly, inwardly, when they make their way out on their own.

And let it! Let them come out. Let them wash away the bitterness. Don’t let her eat you from the inside. It kills in silence.

Why shouldn’t I be sad? Why shouldn’t I be angry, disappointed, and hurt, if I feel that at that moment!
For an hour, two, a day…
Happiness does not come by force!

No need to act. To force. Only that lump will grow even more from the inside. Until it tightens its belly. Until it explodes.

Everything is transient

Nothing lasts forever. Everything is transient. And sadness. And anger. And disappointments.

Life is not just this moment. It will pass.

It is OK! Cry it out!

It’s hard! Bang your fist on the pillow.

Life is unfair! It is! Scream if you want. Let it out. Don’t let it suffocate you.

You don’t have to be happy all the time.
You learn from sadness.
Out of disappointment.
Tears and anger.
Learn while you’re down.

…because then you appreciate the above more when you are there!

And you will be!
…because everything is transient! And that moment you are in now!

It will pass!


1 thought on “Instant happiness? No thanks, I’ll face it, because everything is fleeting”

  1. I’m a firm believer in processing emotions; it’s okay to feel them (no matter what they are) and to look at what we’re feeling without forced positivity — sometimes things are just awful and it’s good to feel anger or upset. What we need more than instant happiness are the tools to deal with whatever it is we are experiencing. Really interesting post!


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